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I have always been trying to search me. I always try to learn why I do wrong and why I do well. Sometimes I get tired of doing bad. Sometimes I feel I have to do some thing really good for others so I could satisfy my inner. Sometimes doing a lot of good can not satisfy because it looks lesser. In simple; being a human being I am not perfect. I use to do good and sometimes bad. I am not out of those who can say me a sacred man. I am such an ordinary person who is in search of the way of light because his sins depressed him a lot.

When I was growing up as a human or when I started getting senses, I heard one name from my parent i.e. Allah. He is the only God of Universe and whatever exists beyond universe. I read Him in Quran. I find Him in the affairs of the world. I find Him while I see someone taking birth. I find Him when I see someone depart from this world. I find Him in my intentions. I find Him in my success. I find Him in my failures. Hence, I find Him in any thing I see, observe and sense in the world. But He is never that thing but actually He is the reason of every thing to exist. I have no doubt in saying that He is the only God.

But sometimes I feel, is just recognizing Him enough? Sometimes I feel whether my perception of Allah is enough to make me successful before Him on the Day of Judgment or there is something else that Allah is asking from me. I have seen many people in my life who have been taking the name of Allah and post that we love Allah and we always do the deeds to please Allah. I always feel inferior because I don’t think as on now I have done anything to claim my love with Allah, even I know I do. I just can say I believe in Allah. I am really feeling guilty to state that “I love Him” because may He shall not ask me one day that what made you say that you love Me & how I shall believe that You do so? So I would not be able to answer Him.

These sentences I LOVE ALLAH, WHEN NO ONE IS THERE; ALLAH IS WITH ME, ALLAH IS MY FRIEND etc are so common in our society but when it comes to accept Allah’s commandment we gets some other gods that reflects in our decision. I feel fear in saying that I love Allah because may be saying it can not be termed as sin when Allah shall ask me that you have done all wrong even by saying you love Me. I always feel fearful while saying anything about my and Allah’s relation because each and every word of mine shall be assessed and may it shall not cause the failure of mine in aftermath.

I know I want to love Allah but this can not be achieved until I shall not accept His commandment 100% and ignore all the pressures of the world in the course of my service for Allah. I don’t want to be a part of the world who talks Allah so loudly but they crush His people. I never like to be a confessor of Allah’s love but accept the wrong wishes of society, system, family or friends that cross Allah’s commandment.

People need Allah for living happy, having all facilities of life, safety of their beloved people, progress in their career, money, satisfaction of their soul and I find Allah saying leave everyone if it comes to His the compliance of His commandments as a creator. He wants all these relation and the world with us under the umbrella of His orders. In our society we serve our own interest by using the name of Allah. We don’t care His commandments. We alter the meaning of His commandment for our own interest. But we claim so high that WE LOVE ALLAH. O People fear that day when Allah shall ask you about your claim of love with Him and present your account that negates your claim.

Allah is the only standard. Allah is the only principle. Allah is the only parameter. Allah is the only scale. All other scales, parameters, principles and standards are unjust and fake. He is calling the whole humanity on that standards but we are so ignorant in serving our gods i.e. wealth, society, career, progress, family, parent, friends, wives, bosses, oppressors and all those whom we think a scale, standard, principle or parameter. It is just because we think that just saying LA ILLAHA ILLAH (There is not God except Allah) is enough. But believe me people I feel really scare when I use to say LA ILLAHA ILLAH because after 28 years of my life I truly understand the meaning of this one sentence. I know the responsibility of saying it. I know the role that this gives me for my life. I never take it as granted that I am a Muslim. I always have been in search of the way of light. I have always been in search of Allah rather than claiming that I LOVE ALLAH, ALLAH IS THERE WITH ME WHEN NO ONE IS THERE, ALLAH IS MY BEST FRIEND. I always have been in search of the meaning all these sentences beyond saying.

I confess that as on today I am even not complying Allah’s commandments to the extent of 0.001%. But this writing is the index of my shame that I want to do so. I just ask my Allah to make me a real complier of His commandments rather than just a claimer of His love. I ask Allah to pardon my sins. I ask Allah to safe me from all SHIRKS (polytheism).

When we talked about SHIRK (polytheism), we think it is only the case when we accept someone else as god with Allah. But in my view when we perform certain act that is openly against Allah’s commandment in order to please or in pressure of someone else so it is also a kind of SHIRK (polytheism). I have heard many times from people that we can not leave this because it is our culture. We can not do it because our parent doesn’t want. We can not do it because it shall not be good for us. Even when we sees Allah says DO IT. So where is our Love with Allah when we openly ignores Allah’s commandment for pleasing someone other than Allah. How we can seek refuge by doing it?

We never need to say but Allah shall see that we love Him if we state truth, serve humanity, fight against injustice, be honest in our roles of life, abide by our promises, keep the trusteeships, never accept anyone in our beloved when they are doing against Allah’s commandments, help needy, respect woman, educate ourselves and others, treat animals with kindness, treat humans with equality, talk nice, smile when people says worst on us, forgive those who hurt and cause loss for us. If we do all these and all other what Quran and Sunnah told us so we don’t need any certification but our Lord shall endorse it otherwise if we offered 500 prayers in a day with a lot of show off and not up to the mark of Allah’s clear commandment, He shall be annoyed on us. Prayer is the first step to surrender before Him but after surrender if we continue to fight against Allah by doing against His commandments for any reason of our betterment, so people you can not fight with Allah.

The bottom line of this article is one, don’t say it loud but show in your acts that you love Allah. See the ways of the true lovers of Allah from Adam A.S, Ibrahim A.S., Mosa A.S., Issa A.S. to Muhammad S.A.W. and those who followed them and try to understand the meaning of love with Allah. Those who love Allah never be in any kind of fear while doing what is right as per Allah’s commandments. Those who fear Allah never feel indifference while going against society, friends, family, parent or anyone if Allah’s commandment is in the middle. Those who love Allah actually love others in the circle of Allah love. They never love Allah in the circle of other’s love.

It is very easy to take His name but it is very difficult to comply His commandments but not for those who love Him truly. I find myself on 0% but pray and working to raise my levels, you can think about yourself. Allah is my creator, He certainly loves me but I have to do many things to reach the claim that I love Allah, even I do. May I shall and you too AMEEN!!!

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sobana Says:

SUBHAN-ALLAH ! It feels great reading this article today, i felt this urge of knowing ALLAh ALMIGHTY 15 days back. Before that i was all lost. i belonged to that group of people who claimed to be knowing ALLAh but that was all i could have been accounted for, just mere words. but today i could feel some change in me, maybe the change to prove my words to ALMIGHTY.i am 22 and would anyone believe that my wuzu had a minor mistake?!! i realized it today when i read a book titled as " asaan namaz ". i felt so ashamed, like even a minor mistake, but how could i be so ignorant despite of the fact that i live in pure islamic society where prayer is offered 5 times a day. Thanks to ALLAh ALMIGHTY that atleast he has inculcated some thirst in me now. the thirst to make ALLAh happy, the thirst to get closer to ALLAh, the thirst to seek only his help and kindness, the thirst and determination to ask for his forgiveness, believing that HE will forgive me for all my mistakes i did intentionally or unintentionally. i desperately need prayers that i stay on right path, the path that is favourite of ALLAh (swt) and his last messenger (pbuh) and all the other messenger of ALLAh !! SIR SAQIB this article was one of the ray of light in my way, thanks for your contribution !!

03 - April - 2010 10:25:15 PM

Reena Says:

I always thought myself to be the only one stuck in between Allah and the world as we see it.. i want to be a good Muslim but always find myself away from the right path which is what frustrates me the most i want to be among those who are doing right .. this article has given me re-assurance that there is no excuse for not doing the things that Allah wants us to do .. there is no doubt i love Allah and fear him i just hope its not to late to correct myself ..

29 - April - 2010 09:30:36 PM

M. Arif Says:

SUBHAN-ALLAH Great effort, I have no words to admire this thinking. Best Wishes.

17 - May - 2010 11:41:25 AM

mehwish Says:

Say, [O Muhammad], "If you should love Allah , then follow me, [so] Allah will love you and forgive you your sins. And Allah is Forgiving and Merciful."

03 - July - 2010 12:10:46 PM

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Mr. Omer

Mr. Omer [1982 born] started  his professional career as a commercial / investment banker after achieving Gold Medal in Finance at master level from University of Karachi in 2006.

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